ACME — Chapter One (REDACTED)

An Introduction (welcome to the wonderful world of entertainment)

Petey stood perspiring, rubbing his porky and ill-defined pinkies together in angst, fearful but energised. Let’s proceed to paint this picture with all the full wonder and respect it commands, for the room in which Petey shook — not entirely out of disturbance, but more anticipation — was so unlike any enclosed space you have ever entered. The only thing known to the average human, like you or I, that could approach the decoration, architecture or general ambience of that cavernous chamber is what hallucinogenic drug users may find in an un-enclosed clearing. The way the walls bent and contorted, as if seen through delicately fluctuating seawater, was deeply surreal and impossible by human standard. Yet, by ACME’s it would have been widely regarded as stuffy and formal. Indeed, The Company building had never taken the care to find more inspiration in its design. It even had repeating corridors, and Petey counted the number of times he saw the same vase of flowers as he walked onward to his fate.

To us, every atom in the room would have screamed with vivid shades of bright colour. That such madness could pack so tightly into one room — while somehow retaining an open-ended air that floated well beyond the skewed, warped walls — was the main horror and allure…